Coming From the Shadows Series
2013
The Beginning of a Spark
The salt-laced wind whipped off of the Irish sea, carrying with it the scent of vinegar from the fish and chip shops that lined the promenade; it was a nostalgic smell, a smell that clung to memories like a sugary residue on a stick of rock; for Raven, it was the smell of childhood – a childhood inextricably linked to the screech of seagulls, the dizzying heights of ‘the Big One’ and the unwavering presence of Yasmin.
2003-2010: The Building Blocks
Raven remembered the first time she saw Yasmin, it was in nursery, a blur of brightly coloured building blocks and a cacophony of toddlers learning to share; or, as was most likely; not to share – Yasmin was a whirlwind of dark curls and boundless energy.
Yasmin was attempting to build a tower that was taller than herself, giggling as it inevitably tumbled down; Raven, the shy four-year-old that she was, clutched a well-worn teddy bear, she was watching Yasmin from the periphery
“Need help?” she offered; her voice was barely a whisper; but Yasmin had heard Raven speak
Yasmin’s face lit up “Yeah!” she said with excitement in her voice “This is rubbish; it keeps fallin’ over” she stated with a laugh
And…, just like that; a friendship was forged amidst the chaos of spilled juice and the shared frustration of gravity.
As time progressed, they would end up in the same primary school; they had become inseparable; from building sandcastles on the beach, their laughter would echo against the relentless roar of the waves – sharing whispers secrets beneath bedsheets during sleepovers; typically fuelled by the fizzy pop and illicit thrill of staying up past their bedtime.
They would navigate the treacherous waters of the playground politics together, a united front against the horrors of nit checks and the perceived injustice of double maths.
Yasmin was the bolder of the two; the instigator – she was fearless, always pushing the boundaries, often due to the result of her homelife, little snippets that Raven started to take notice off – what was normal to Raven, was not so for those that observed them, Yasmin was often amongst the Wright household, as it would turn out, Yasmin’s homelife was not the best, often faced with neglect from her mother and father – but this only encouraged Yasmin’s desire to break the rules and she often dragged Raven along.
But; Raven grounded Yasmin – she was a calming presence to Yasmin’s often volatile energy, they were two halves of a whole, a perfectly imperfect partnership.
By the time of secondary school; the landscape was ever changing – and, as puppy fat melted away; revealing nascent curves, innocent games had given way to whispered conversations about boys and make-up.
Their worlds were expanding; and their friendship was as strong as ever, it was beginning to stretch to accommodate new experiences and burgeoning identities.
2013: The Changing Tides
The Year was 2013 – Raven, now fourteen, was on the cusp of womanhood and was becoming acutely aware of the changes swirling within her; Yasmin, a year older and brimming with a confidence that Raven envied, had already embraced the world of boys and late-night parties.
It was during these turbulent times that Daniel had entered the picture.
Daniel was a brooding presence, a stark contrast to Yasmin’s effervescent personality; he was tall and lanky, with a mop of dark hair that perpetually fell into his eyes, he had a sharp wit and a sardonic sense of humour that often left teachers speechless and classmates snickering – he was trouble, plain and simple; and despite this, for some reason, Raven found herself drawn to him.
They met in art class, both struggling to capture the stark beauty of a wilting sunflower; Daniel, with his charcoal smudged his fingers and air of quiet intensity, offered Raven a few pointers, his touch, as he adjusted her grip on the pencil, sent a jolt through her.
He and Yasmin already knew of each other, united in their shared penchant for mischief; soon the three of them were inseparable, a chaotic trio causing havoc in the hallowed hallway of their school.
The skipped classes when given an opportunity, and, through Daniel’s influence – would try stolen cigarettes, though Yasmin, upon seeing Raven choking on her attempt decided to put a stop to that pretty quickly.
They perfected their timed witty retorts at unsuspecting teachers.
Daniel and Yasmin were a force of nature; their rebellious spirits feed off of each other and Raven, she found herself caught in the middle; torn between loyalty to Yasmin, and a growing fascination with Daniel.
But, there was something else stirring within Raven – something she couldn’t quite name; something that made her stomach flutter, her palms sweat, and it wasn’t Daniel; it was Yasmin.
The way Yasmin’s eyes would sparkle when she laughed, the curve of her lips as she told a joke; the effortless way she moved through the world – all of it was consuming Raven, filling her with a confusing mixture of adoration and anxiety, she found herself watching Yasmin more closely, listening more intently, she wanted to be closer somehow.
One drizzly afternoon they were huddled at the back of the bus with many of their other classmates; they had all decided to go up to town centre straight from school; while travelling, Yasmin was regaling the group with a story about the disastrous attempt to sneak into a nightclub – Daniel, as usual offered sarcastic commentary, Raven however found herself unable to concentrate at all on the conversation, her gaze was fixated on Yasmin’s hand resting casually on her knee.
The bus lurched; and Yasmin’s hand brushed against Raven’s, a shockwave of sensation coursed through Raven, it left her breathless and disoriented, quickly she averted her gaze, her cheeks flushed – one of the girls; Lauren, raised her eyebrow with a confused expression, but it drew Yasmin’s attention towards Raven “You okay” Yasmin asked, her brow was furrowed with concern
“Yeah…., fine” Raven mumbled, willing her heart to slow down
“Maybe she’s unwell?” Lauren asked; shrugging her shoulders, Daniel, he was oblivious to all this, or even the swirling undercurrents between Raven and Yasmin, he simply continued his tirade about the bouncer that had foiled Yasmin’s nightclub escapade.
Raven though; she couldn’t hear him; all she could hear was the frantic beating of her own pulse; her heart beating so quickly it was dizzying, the whispers of a secret she didn’t dare to voice.
Later that evening, laying in her bed – Raven stared up at the glow-in-the-dark stars plastered on her ceiling, Raven grappled with her feelings, she knew what lads were meant to feel for girls, and what girls were meant to feel for lads – she had seen it in movies, read about it in books; but what she felt, it was towards Yasmin – it was different, more profound – it terrified her, but also, it also exhilarated her – she couldn’t help but feels streaks of tears fall down her face as she was trying to work out if perhaps there might have been something wrong, would people judge her for what she was feeling – would her family judge her, she couldn’t admit her emotions, she didn’t know if she should even try to talk about it.
Then, there was Daniel; that in itself was complicated – he made no secret of his interest towards her, he often flirted with Raven, his dark eyes lingering on her a little too long; his hands brushing against hers a little too often; but she did enjoy the attention, the feeling of being desired, but…., it felt wrong – it felt like a betrayal of something she couldn’t articulate.
On the following day; Daniel would corner Raven at the end of school, his expression was serious “Raven” he said, his voice low “I need to tell you something”
Raven looked at him; her eyes just seemed to scream of terror; her heart pounded in her chest – this was it, she thought, he was going to make some confession, what if he did; how would she respond – she couldn’t respond, could she?, she just felt everything suddenly building up in her head – what should she do?
Before Daniel could speak though; Yasmin interrupted “Daniel; leave her alone” she snapped “I need to talk to her”
Daniel was taken aback by Yasmin’s vehemence; he hesitated before reluctantly retreating; Yasmin had seen the look in Raven’s eyes, she saw a terrified expression – it confused her more than anything, why was she so terrified? “What was all that about” she questioned, looking into her eyes carefully, as if she was trying to read her thoughts
Raven swallowed hard “N-Nothing” she said, but her voice lacked conviction, she didn’t know what else to respond with
Yasmin stared at her for a long moment, her expression was unreadable; but, it was obvious she was trying to work something out, before finally giving Raven an indication to come along as she turned and began walking off – Raven followed, but she was a swirling mix of emotions – relief and despair.
The tides were turning, and Raven felt as though she was being pulled in every direction at once; she didn’t dare speak of any of it; there was just too much at risk, what if she would be caste aside, lose her best and longest friend – no, she couldn’t risk any of it, but, this would just lead to emotion turmoil and thousands of questions going ignored; it was building, and she would need to face it even if she didn’t want to admit it.
Written By: Westley H.
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