What If, If Only
The whispers start, a gentle hum, inside my head, Of paths not walked, of words unsaid, of maps unread. “What if,” I muse, a cloud of thought, soft and deep, “I’d turned left then, instead of right, and glimpsed a different sleep?”
“If only,” sighs the other voice, a sorrowing dove, “I’d listened close, to counsel kind, or trusted in my love. What if I’d seized that fleeting chance, that opportunity’s chime, Instead of letting doubt’s slow hand just steal away my time?”
It’s a curious game, this mental dance, a shimmering, ‘what if’ ballet, Where alternate realities spin, just a breath, a thought away. I see myself, in a sun-drenched cafe, sipping a different tea, Or trekking mountains, high and grand, a wildly different me.
“If only I had spoken up,” the echo softly calls, “Instead of shrinking to the side, behind self-constructed walls.” And “What if I had never met that person, long since gone?” Would my own story then have been a brighter, clearer dawn?
The thoughts drift in, like dandelion seeds, on a whimsical breeze, Each carrying a tiny wish, a memory to appease. A life of ‘should-haves,’ ‘could-haves,’ ‘might-haves,’ all arrayed so neat, A hypothetical tapestry, woven bittersweet.
But then a giggle bubbles up, a spark, a sudden light, “What if,” I ask, with curious gaze, “this path I chose, with all its plight, And all its bumps and joyous leaps, its twists and turns unseen, Is exactly where I’m meant to be, a vibrant, living scene?”
What if the ‘other’ life, imagined, filled with a rosy glow, Had its own shadowed corners, stories I’ll never know? Perhaps that path of endless ease held secrets, dark and deep, While this one, built of choices made, the truest lessons keep.
“If only I’d done things differently,” the old refrain still sighs, But now I meet its wistful gaze with twinkling, knowing eyes. For every misstep, every stumble, every moment of despair, Has painted vibrant streaks upon this journey I now share.
What if the art of living isn’t found in a perfect, ‘if only’ quest, But in embracing every single step, and putting fears to test? To laugh at little blunders, to revel in the unexpected grace, And find the magic blooming brightly, in this very time and place.
So let the “what ifs” float away, like bubbles in the air, And “if only” be a gentle hum, a melody to share. For this path, the one I’m walking now, with stardust on my shoes, Is wonderfully, wildly, perfectly mine, no matter what I lose.
Thank You for Reading
Deborah C. Langley
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