The Argos queue was always a trial, but Mark, a veteran of Her Majesty’s Special Air Service found the quiet tedium a welcome change from the experiences he had, all those missions aboard, here, here he was simply for a kettle, his old one had finally given up the ghost after years of brewing lukewarm tea – a tragedy in any Brit’s book.
Suddenly, a shout ripped through the air – shattering the retail tranquillity “Everybody down!; this is a robbery!”
Mark sighed; bloody typical, he’d come for a domestic appliance and ended up in a bloody action movie; he glanced a the source of the commotion.
A Skinny lad, barely out of his teens, brandishing what looked suspiciously like a toy gun; the kid was Darrel, judging by the nervous tremor in his voice and the Argos’ staff expression of amusement it was clear there wasn’t any sense of danger.
“Alright sunshine” Mark drawled, his voice cutting through Darrel’s panicked rant “Let’s not do anything we’ll regret, eh?” he observed Darrel carefully “That thing looks like it came out of a Christmas cracker”
Darrel’s eyes widened and he fumbled with the gun, nearly dropping it “It’s real!; I swear!” he squeaked
Mark assessed the situation; Toy Gun, Terrified Kid and Bewildered Bystanders – this wasn’t exactly the siege of Mogadishu, still, protocol was protocol
“Alright” Mark said, adopting a disarming tone “Tell you what; why don’t you lower the weapon, and we can have a chat, maybe even share a cuppa – I just got a new kettle Y’know, will make a cracking brew”
Darrel, clearly overwhelmed, hesitated “I…, I need money”
“Money for what?; Love, a New Xbox, games…, I am sure we can sort something out; put this gun down”
Darrel glanced about; his resolve crumbling faster than a digestive biscuit in a hot tea; Mark took his chance, a swift, almost casual movement; and he’d disarmed Darrel, the plastic gun clattering to the floor.
He then proceeded to do what he was really here for; buy a kettle, after completing his purchase, Mark walked out to find Darrel sat with two police officers “He definitely needs to get better at these things” Mark said laughing quietly as he walked off
The police officers gave Mark a weird look as he walked by carrying his new kettle.
Written By: Westley H
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